Glos·sa·ry

“An alphabetical list of terms or words found in or relating to Team Toe; a brief dictionary of toebock slang.”

Flow Man (noun) \ ˈflō – ‘man \

Someone who doesn’t quite get it, yet lovable nonetheless; hurting yet charming. “Unfortunately for the flowman, getting laid at the local bar was not a lucrative career.

Long Body (noun) \ ˈlȯŋ ˈbä-dē \

A person whose height exceeds six-foot; someone who has to shop at Big & Tall. “Ryan tried to slouch down and hide in the large crowd, but to no avail. It is damn near impossible for a long body to hide in plain view.

Short Stack (noun) \ ˈshȯrt – ˈstak \

A person whose height stands at or below 5.6’’, but who maintains a strong build, thus, extenuating a wider-than-taller proportion in their physique; choadish; tank body. “It seemed that body slamming the concrete didn’t bother Paul much, as Short Stacks are known to simply bounce and roll away from serious harm when they bail.

Stacked (verb) \ stakt \

To exhibit the qualities of or to physically become or be a Short Stack. “Manu told Matt that he should probably hit the gym every day after work to keep his health, and ever since, he has gotten really stacked.

Street Soldier (noun) \ ˈstrēt -ˈsōl-jər \

A skateboarder who isn’t afraid to get grimey in the streets, all the while maintaining the stamina of a racehorse. “Silas got ten tricks that day, once again establishing his strong presence as a street soldier.

Squatty Body (verb) \ˈskwä-tē – ˈbä-dē \

A female Short Stack. “Kevin seemed to always run into trouble when he dated a Squatty Body.

The Patriot (noun) \ T͟Hə – pātrēət \

A 1977 GMC Vandura that symbolizes the freedom of the road and embodies tribute to the American troubadour; literally our house. “Tensions were high when the Patriot broke down somewhere near Fortuna, CA.

The Scums (noun) \ t͟hə – ˈskəm-zz \

A great enemy of the Toesman; a resilient ailment that demotivates and sometimes immobilizes the Toesman; molluscum contagiosum. “They called her Beetlejuice, and it was rumored that she gave Ryan a bad case of The Scums when they hooked up on Nicole’s balcony back in 2005.

Toebock (adjective) \ ˈtō-ˈbäk \

A shoe that has been tied too tightly, causing the toe of the shoe to crease and point upwards. “Gurwell was confused as to why the other kids kept calling him a clown, but then he realized that his shoes had a bad case of Toebock, and it all began to make sense.

Toesman (noun) \ ˈtō-zz-‘man \ plural – ‘men \

Any individual(s) who is dedicated to packing a bag and leaving their life behind without thought; usually someone who is unemployed. “The Toesmen set off, for another city, for another attempt to succeed, and unfortunately, not yet known to them, for another bad case of The Scums.

Trog (noun) \ ˈträg \

A ragamuffin who is always on the hunt for scraps of something; an opportunist with low standards. “Walking down the street in his over-sized dashiki, he really looked like a trog.

Trogging (verb) \ ˈträg-ing \

The act of fulfilling a Trog’s nature; picking stuff up off the ground. “Someone just saw Travis somewhere in Brooklyn, NY, trogging around for cigarette butts at 5 a.m.

Toeblock (noun) \tō bläk\

A temporary residence inhabited by Team Toe; always in a different city; lasts from two weeks to two months. “Shit got weird at the Toeblock in Kansas City; it’s surprising we got any footy at all.

weezie (noun) \ ˈwēz-ē \

A girl of Polish descent who cannot resist a Toesmen. “Adam had been on the road for far too long and had accidentally mixed up Weezie 1 with Weezie 2 via text.

weirdsted (adjective) \ ˈwird-stəd \

A behavior pattern that tends to make others around the person feel weird and awkward; usually behavior associated with sporadic anger that cannot be attributed to any current or particular happening; commonly induced by alcohol. “Two Hawks slammed a pint of Skol Vodka shortly after he landed in Denver and by the time he got to Rock Bar, he was weirdsted. It was only a matter of minutes before he got 86-ed.

Zorchathon (noun) \ ˈzȯrch-ə-thän \

A contest measuring who can get the most zorched; created by American author, Travis Knight on a skateboarding trip through Washington and into the Olympic National Forest (2011). “Shit had just gotten weird at Linda’s shag shack in Fortuna, and already it was apparent that Steven was the top runner in this year’s Zorchathon.

Zorched (adjective) \ ˈzȯrcht \

Fried out; stoned and drunk to the point of near non-functionality, yet still puttering around. “Paul had been sitting on 3rd St. Beach all day burning doobies and drinking beer, so by the time he got back to his apartment, he was so zorched that he fell asleep right in the middle of a heated Tiger Woods Golf tournament with Danny.

Photideo (noun) \ foh -tidēō \

A collection of photographs and videos combined to make up one cinematographic feature; traditionally crafted on an archaic, early-edition Canon PowerShot, and an outdated version of iMovie. Damn, Two Hawks! I saw your Photideo and that shit was sick!

Phonideo (noun) \ fōn – idēō\

A collection of photographs and video combined to make up one cinematographic feature; commonly made by washed up dudes. “It seems like every week a new phonideo washes ashore in San Jose.”